Translator: Wan ED/PR: Personal Ghost
⟨Chapter 10⟩
“Dan-ah, Dan-ah…”
Someone called out to Yu Dan from among the parade.
It was his grandfather. He cried out in joy.
“Come here. Let’s go together.”
Just at the moment when he was about to join the corpse parade following his grandfather’s affectionate becoming, a strange thought suddenly occurred to him.
I don’t know my grandfather’s face or voice. They said he departed a long time before I was born, at a young age.
Yu Dan glared at the grandfather.
“Who are you?”
Abruptly the ghost’s face twisted terribly. The thing let out a shriek and tried to snatch Yu Dan by the wrist.
At that moment.
Someone blocked the way in front of him.
A monster wearing a plain white mask without features.
When he raised his hand, lotus flowers appeared in the air. The dazzling brilliance burst out in four directions.
“Aaack!”
The face of the ghost, who tried to drag Yu Dan away, disappeared. It fled by becoming a fog together with all other ghosts. All that remained was that faint fog.
“Thank you.”
Yu Dan bowed his head. The faceless ghost asked:
“It’s not a place for humans. Why are you wandering here instead of coming back.”
“I’m going back.”
He spoke back like this and looked at the ground, but there was nothing there. Was it because he was too slow? The golden footprints the fox left behind disappeared without a trace at some point. The only road lead into the darkness.
“That’s bad! What should I do?!”
“What is the problem?”
At that soft voice, he became infinitely weak. Yu Dan replied with tears in his eyes.
“I lost the footprints.”
“Footprints?”
“The fox made footprints, but I lost them. What should I do? I’m in a big trouble now. But I made such a noise that I’d surely get back the soul wrapping cloth and come back. He will ridicule me again saying ‘As I expected’ and ‘Just like a fool’. But if I don’t go back, the fox will receive a big karma. How? He said no, but he sent me out because I stubbornly insisted. I have to go back.”
“You’re indeed in big trouble, huh?”
The faceless ghost spoke.
“If so, then how about I make footprints instead?”
“Really?”
“It’s not for nothing. How about you give something in return for each footprint?”
Yu Dan became sullen.
“I don’t have anything.”
“It’s not like that.”
The faceless ghost stretched out his hand. As the cold finger lightly touched his forehead, a white flower fell off. Yu Dan was on the brink of crying, but at that amazing sight, the tears went back in.
“What is that?”
“A soul flower. It contains your memories.”
Looking closely, something glimmered on the flower petals. Sailing on the blue sea, an enormous passenger ship full of people.
“You boarded a big ship, huh?”
“Right! When I was really young. I was even younger than I’m now. I went to play on an island with mom and dad. I fed seagulls snacks and gathered seashells on a beach. It was very fun!”
“Then it seem it’s a very precious memory.”
The faceless ghost spun the soul flower.
“Can I take it?”
Yu Dan worried for a moment, and then replied:
“Only if you make footprints. Because I really have to go back.”
“Great.”
The faceless ghost turned around.
With each step, a soul flower fell off Yu Dan’s head and attached itself to him. Every fluttering petal illuminated a different scene.
The memory of putting on shoes after a rainy day and jumping into puddles, splashing water. The memory or randomly pressing on keys while sitting beside his mom playing piano. The memory of assembling a telescope together with his father. The memory of hurting his arm when tripping over while skating. The memory of looking for grandmother’s missing jindong dog[1] with his maternal cousin for an entire day…
All those things that flickered like images seemed mysterious and somehow unknowingly pretty. But not all memories were pretty.
As he walked following the faceless ghost like this, he at last saw the shining brightly exit ahead of him. Yu Dan shouted:
“We arrived!”
“Okay. But what should I do? There are no soul flowers left now.”
The faceless ghost looked back at him.
“You need to pay if I’m going to make a final footprint. What can we do? How about you give me the wrapping cloth instead of the soul flower?”
Uh? He had a wrapping cloth?
Yu Dan looked down.
He was clenching tightly a white wrapping cloth in his two hands. He was seeing it for the first time. Who gave it to him? Even though he tried to trace back his memory, nothing came out.
“Okay…”
He was ready to hand it over, but stopped. Something bothered him.
“No, wait. I don’t think I can do that.”
“Why?”
He couldn’t reply. There seemed to be a clear and important reason. But he couldn’t figure it out.
The faceless ghost spoke again.
“It doesn’t matter what we do, you know?”
“That’s right.”
Yu Dan nodded his head. His head was completely blank. There were no memories at all.
“It doesn’t matter even if you don’t return, you know?”
“Right…”
He replied blankly.
“It doesn’t matter if I don’t return. But I can’t. Because I think someone left those footprints behind. That means to say ‘come back’, you know? It means that they would be waiting.”
Yu Dan spoke clearly.
“So I want to go back.”
The soul flowers that were stuck to the faceless ghost’s body fluttered lightly. Perhaps he was laughing.
“If so, then I’ll give them all back.”
The soul flowers poured down. Yu Dan was instantly covered in the flowers. When the last bud softly sat down on the top of his head, a memory flowed in.
The field of dense green grass. The children in cotton chimajeogori[2] jumping around.
“That’s not my memory.”
“It was stuck to you.”
The faceless ghost’s voice overlapped with the children’s laughter.
— Go away! You’re dirty!
— Our mom told us not to play with you!
That’s right. No one came close to her. They said they couldn’t come close to her, because she was a daughter of a leper. But she always chased after them. It didn’t even matter when they threw stones at her. If only she could be together with the children that looked to always have fun.
One day, when she was chasing after them like always, she fell into a hole. The stone pile at the opening collapsed and blocked the way out.
Please save me. I’m here.
She shouted, but no one could hear her. Everyone was only absorbed in their games. Only the chatting and laughter were heard.
The air gradually went out. She was losing her breath.
I just wanted to be together with everyone.
“Cough! Cough!”
Yu Dan opened his eyes coughing.
He wasn’t in the hole blocked by a pile of stones. It also wasn’t the world of monsters. The white, bone-like trees and the dark blue fog all disappeared like a lie. Instead, he saw the books filling all four walls.
It was the fox yokai’s study.
Because the sun had set at some point, it was dark outside. The quietly burning candle cast shadows in four directions. Baek Ran was lightly flipping pages as if the book wasn’t interesting at all. Seeing his face, he at last realized.
“It was you, huh?”
The faceless ghost was this very fox yokai. When thinking about it, only his face was covered, but his voice and particular atmosphere were exactly the same. Yet somehow he couldn’t recognize him at the time? Even though he thought about it by himself, it felt absurd.
Yu Dan stood up.
He was holding a wrapping cloth in his arms. It didn’t have any weight but felt warm. It was quiet, but he heard the sound of regular breathing. He was safe and alive. Even thought he went through all of that, he was doing well.
I succeeded, huh?
A sigh of relief came out by itself.
“I’m glad. Because I brought him back.”
“I’m glad too.”
The fox agreed.
The soul wrapping cloth wriggled slightly. Yu Dan asked as he put it down on the desk.
“By the way, why did you wear a faceless mask and played a prank?”
“I never wore anything like a mask.”
“You didn’t wear it?”
“Didn’t you wander Mōryō forest as a child? Because it was before the time we met, You couldn’t recognize me and perceived me as a faceless ghost. Without even knowing anything, You instantly start with blaming. In all respects, I thought I overestimated Your abilities by leaving only footprints, so I decided to go back three thousand ri[3], but now I’m thinking I worked too much.”
Yu Dan was speechless.
However, after a moment his face crumbled again.
“But the fact you played a prank is true anyway.”
“You caught it.”
A faint smile appeared on the fox’s face.
At that moment, the child ginseng yokai twins entered, holding a broom and dusting cloth. It seemed that they came to clean the study, but when they found Yu Dan, both of them rejoiced.
“Guest-nim, you safely returned with the soul wrapping cloth! You worked really hard! The child’s noona will be extremely happy!”
“You truly did well! It wouldn’t be an easy matter!”
After praising him first of all things, they approached him closely and asked.
“But how was the world on the other side? It would be a good time learning a lesson to live the life to the fullest and manage your health. How good was it? It wouldn’t be bad to revisit it occasionally, every time when You don’t have enthusiasm and feel gloomy and depressed, correct?”
“No. No matter how I think about it, our make-up was too good in its extremity. He had to become a yeokkwi and have fun exploring the world of monsters. Look. He is making an expression as if he is already missing that place. We have to take out all alcohol and cigarettes downstairs, and stick to him to prevent him from crossing the crosswalk on the red lights.”
Yu Dan was at a loss for words.
“Stop worrying! I’m not dying! As you said, the make-up was amazing, but in the end I was found. Probably because of that strange alcohol pot that sometimes grew bigger when a human looked at it. The monsters recognized my identity, and I barely escaped before they caught me… wait a moment. Thinking back, why did I suddenly return to being a child there?”
“You’re asking about it quickly, eh?”
Baek Ran took out the gourd bottle as he replied:
“It’s simple. Because you didn’t have this.”
After he opened the lid, something quickly returned to Yu Dan’s chest. With a ‘tok’ his shoulders became a bit heavier.
“What was that?”
“Feeling of responsibility.”
“Responsibility?”
“That’s right. The child doesn’t know about responsibility. It’s the biggest difference between humans and wicked, monster and ghostly spirits. They don’t feel responsibility. They will do anything if it’s just fun, stay away from things they dislike. If something is precious, they won’t think about the aftermath and steal it, and once they put their hands on it, they absolutely won’t want to give it back.”
Baek Ran put a small talisman on the soul wrapping cloth.
When he sent it outside the window, it lightly floated high in the sky. Yu Dan stared at it and then suddenly had a thought.
“Anyhow, I don’t know anything about it. But that last soul flower that you returned to me, wasn’t that a memory of the Soul Thief stuck to the wrapping cloth? If so, aren’t they just lonely? Whatever they do, isn’t that because they hate being lonely?”
He didn’t say anything more. Even if he didn’t say anything more, he thought that if the other side was a yokai, he would understand everything.
“That’s right, huh? Then, if we met with them again, at that time…”
“Please treat them with a bit more kindness.”
The fox yokai spoke as if he read his mind.
Far away in the sky, a soul wrapping cloth like a white balloon was slowly traversing the night sky to return to its owner.
Sometimes there are times when one wants to take a different road from the one they always take.
Yu Dan stopped the bicycle for a moment.
He did it to be sure but…. It was as he expected.
At the time when the evening was stealthily approaching and one or two streetlamps were on. On the quiet playground, after everyone returned home, a female student wearing a school uniform and a kid were playing a ball game. It seemed they made a bet who could catch more throws of the ball they threw at each other, and were quite enjoying themselves.
“You won’t be able to catch it!”
The ball, which the kid threw with all his might, hit the monkey bars and bounced in Yu Dan’s direction. The ball hit his leg and rolled around him.
“My apologies!”
The siblings shouted at the same time. The kid ran to pick up the ball. He accepted the ball with two hands from Yu Dan, who picked it up and handed it to him, but suddenly flinched in surprise and stared at Yu Dan’s face.
“Ah…?”
He clearly saw him somewhere. But where? Such face.
“What’s the matter?”
The female student quickly approached.
She surveyed Yu Dan from the top to the bottom with wary eyes. What is a male highschooler doing coming to the playground alone at this hour? Does he live in our apartment complex? Isn’t he some delinquent? While sending him a gaze containing all kinds of suspicions, she pulled her dongsaeng, who stood blankly.
“Let’s go now. We decided to clean the house before mom and dad come back to make a surprise, remember?”
“Ah, right!”
The kid promptly turned around.
Yu Dan watched the siblings’ backs.
It was as the fox yokai said.
They couldn’t remember a thing. Because the bad dream ended, and they had to return to their original world now. It was natural for it to happen.
However…
They walked a few steps, and the noona slightly leaned her shoulder to stretch her arm lower. The dongsaeng held his hand high. The two hands of different sizes met. They held each other very tightly, as if promising they won’t lose each other the second time.
They said that they wouldn’t be able to remember, but it wasn’t like nothing had happened.
Even though they didn’t know it in their heads, they knew it in their hearts.
Yu Dan turned around.
It didn’t feel so bad.
*~*~*
[1] jindong dog — a dog breed native to Korea.
[2] chimajeogori — a general term referring to the top and skirt of a hanbok worn by women.
[3] ri — ‘ri’ is about 393 meters
Translator’s note: There are so many things that feel so unrealistic about this chapter. Baek Ran who uses a casual tone, seagulls that aren’t terrorists stealing people’s snacks…
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